Depression And Abandonment
I have been trying to figure out why so many people with mental difficulties are basically abandoned by their friends or loved ones. Do they think that are entire conversation is going to be centered around the illness at hand? Do they think that we are going to attach ourselves to them and drain the life out of them or even worse pass on the mental demon illness?
This may seem weird considering I run this blog but I hate talking about my illness. I rather spend a couple of hours talking about why the other hates their job then spend a couple of minutes speaking about my health situation. Trust me I spend way to much time in my head trying to figure out what is wrong and what I can do to fix it. What I am looking for in people in my life is basically a distraction and a reminder of what my life was like before the illness took over. Take care
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in my personal experience i am often to blame. i push people away. i don’t let them help. i don’t return phone calls. although the true friends will still be there on the other side. will be content with a text message or email if that is the most i can give at the time.
I’ve often wondered the same thing myself. My blog is the only place I open up about how I’m truly feeling yet I’m still abandoned by loved ones. Doesn’t make much sense.
I think for the most part, it’s the middle one. Although the mental difficulty may not be discussed, it is underlying the interactions. I think sometimes friends try too hard to help, are not able to and become disillusioned and feel useless. Then they feel as though they’ve lost something; that their loved one isn’t the same person; and then they move away. It’s funny…I think in these circumstances, talking more might actually help!
However, there is that subset of people where ignorance rules, and they do think it will pass on.
Gawd, stigma is so powerful…
I wrote this statement last month which basically sums up my view “* I put on my best face when I speak to you because I know you are not interested in the pain and I can not afford to lose you”
I have lost so many people since I became ill that I am almost terrified to lose anymore. I have difficulties in seeing the reason to be vocal about my illness (off of this blog) for I really believe that there is nothing that anyone can do and all it will cause are the people to become worried and become stressed due to my illness which I do not want to do to anyone. Take care
antiswer may be right. talking more might be better because they do feel helpless. so maybe we should talk more and let them know talking helps, that listening is what they CAN do. they worry regardless. maybe we could just censor the details? like i could talk about how bad my day was yesterday, how it made me feel, but leave out that i wanted to SH and almost did.